Thursday, December 25, 2008

The season where evry1 wants to get married...!

Have you noticed the number of people getting married these days...its as if the world is suddenly coming to an end and all the people decided to enter marital life in a rush before they die!

I have actually lost count of the number of wedding invitations coming to our place everyday...and considering my own elder brothers wedding is to be in February...it all seems....well... wierd!!

School friends....college friends...buddies...suddenly...are now people who are starting a family!

Well...thats life i guess...every day is a new surprise...

The wonder though...that all the people who marry...each one of them....never expects that he/she will be in the 46% of the couples whose marriages eventually failed over a period of time...
Bad thing to expect when you are getting married but still...but knowing this...If you still go ahead with it...mannn....that girl/boy must be really worth it eh!

Looking at me and looking at people around...I wish relationships were a bit easier...they are in a way...always...but we always have to find atleast one small reason (tiny winy reason may it be!) to make it complicated...
Of course....how else will you add that "masala" to your life...

Come to think of it...If i met a girl...i approached her...we became friends...i realised i love her...she feels the same...and there you go...lifes a bliss...there are flowers and dried leaves falling from god knws where...and suddenly...in the middle of the day...i burst out into a romantic song...!

I mean...if it was always this simple...what would be the fun in it???
Its like a Karan Johar movie...which just started and ended its story in the trailor!!
(OMG...that would be real sadd...wont it!)

So...the conclusion here will be... MAKE A LOVE STORY THAT INSPIRES KARAN JOHAR TO MAKE A MOVIE OUT OF!
Full on emotions...drama...romance...fun...!
~ LOL ~
(Godd...i cant believe i jut wrote that! ill ignore the above lines everytime i read this blog...and if someone does ask... im in complete denail that i wrote it!)

How many times in your life...have you seen a person, Everytime you meet someone interesting , and said..."What will it be like being in a relationship with this person?"
How much ever you deny it...If you are single...i guarantee you do it every single time..conciously or subconciously...!

The point here is...there are many people in your life...I only wished the equation to relationships was a bit simple...if it always clicked the very first time...and more importantly...BOTH DID SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!

I admit it...I DREAM of Love..almost every second...every minute...And i find it to be perfect...mainly because its a picture of something i would and always want to have...And of course, Life is different in it...it is good...nice...heart warming...
Dont ask me whom i dream of...coz its not a girl i dream of...its love...the girl...will eventually follow someday...
:-)

amol: Why just ppl cant live a simple practicle life than complicated dreamy life
Prasad: coz we always try to turn our dreams into reality
amol: thats where we make our life miserable
Prasad: for some ppl...its the way to live...
amol: the dream u r talking about is about ur passion to be something
not impossible things...and then u make other ppls lives miserable
Prasad: but thats wat....ur dreams are abt YOU...they were never abt others!
amol: so while pursuing that dream we effect other ppls lives
Prasad: maybe...little realising that even your life is gettin affected
:)

Monday, December 22, 2008

something i want...but something i dont expect...

I think the biggest thing about old friendship is that it just gets crisper and crisper with time...
Some of the friends you made...can never be let gone of...no matter what happens....things have to get back to normal...as if nothing happened...
That exactly shows the purity of that relationship...and most importantly...how much you and the other person/people value the pure bond you share...

It cant be let gone of ever...cant be replaced...and thats the bottom line!

I was telling a friend the other day about how i have realised the kind of person i am...and about how i can genuinely care for some people...maybe do things out of my way...
I only do things that come naturally to me...and maybe its because thats the way i am...i wont do anything out of force or compulsion...so...whatever happens...its normal..and natural...

I will not change the person that i am...i just cannot do that....but definitely....now...i have become careful...and practical to some extent...

I wanna do many things...but i stop myself from doing it....somewhere its about how people with take it...and what will the consequences be...about whether or not they deserve that much of importance in my life...

I believe strongly now...that if things have to happen....if friendships are to be immortal...if love has to last....it happpens naturally...and somehow...it is destined to be...

I have had some really good time in the past few days...memories and moments i will cherish for life...

A silent conversation...a funny story...bits of paper joining lives...A dark night...a look that says it all...a moment to cry it all out...a caring word that changes everything...close yet so distant...


...and i think its because i have learnt to let go...and not hold on to things...expecting they will materialize and be a part of my life...but doing what is to be done...and what you feel like doing...

Learn to give share and care selflessly...it might not return the same from the same source...but it will help another part of your life...
sometimes...where more is needed...

When you really want something,have the courage to walk away from it...

Thursday, December 18, 2008

One month blog!

Its been exactly one month since I last blogged...not that i had nothing to write about...but i just thought what it would be like to put a whole months thoughts into one single post...so..yeah...this post might come across as a bit distorted...irrelevant situations put together maybe...

This month has been good...and a lot of memories created which will last for long...

I dont understand why they have internal exams in MBA....everything is just a formality...and the marks are favoured...on the basis of where you rank in the books of the professors...
MBA is not about marks...not about theory...not about how good you wrote an answer..and if they do realise this...and why dont they do something about it!
A serious pattern change i say...no exams plzz...
I look at the 74% i scored...and it just doesnt mean anything to me...primarily coz i know i havnt taken much efforts to get...
but hey...im not complaining...whatever more you get is yours to keep right! ;-)

The exams came and went really fast...and somewhere i think everyone in the class knew this was an unofficial end to MBA...the last sem is just a formality really...hardly matters...
I havent really attached myself to MBA...so its a serious doubt if i will miss the place...the course...the people...?
Maybe a few people...i really dont know...

Had taken a break to Goa with a few friends some days ago....somewhere needed to be away for a while...
As amazing as the time spent was...it gave me a chance to actually relaise what i have always wanted...people i would like to be around...people i miss...and who really matter to me...

I think the major problem in your life is that there are certain things which you would like to avoid and get away from...and then there are those certain things which you want to keep close but cant for some unknown reason...the essence of life i think...is to blend these two things...
Being where YOU want to be...and what YOU want to do...rather than to bother about how these things (which hardly matter anyways!) will impact your life...
Live in a way that will impact situations around instead...create a world for yourself rather than trying to everytime adjust yourself to something that doesnt seem like a place you should be at...


Not every time in an interview does the Interviewer say this to you...
"You know apart from the profile we are looking for....whatever be the result of this interview...i would first like to compliment you and your parents for the values they have brought you up with..."

That felt really nicee...Called up my Mom and Dad and told them...somewhere...i am glad i could make them proud somehow...
That day was I think the start of a new positive stride in my life...

The way I see it...If i have not done anything wrong till now...and if i have been true...Nothing bad can happen...eventually...everything will be alright...and that feeling hasnt gone since that day...that smile hasnt gone since that day...
You fret about the past...about things that shouldnt have happened....but its nice to face the future with that smile on the face...

Me and a friend were having this conversation about how people should keep things the way they are...and not spoil the relationship that you share with the person at any cost..
like..If you are a friend...keep being a friend...dont spoil it by saying you are in love with that person...it will just make things uncomfortable...and eventually will lead to a break in the friendship because things just got irritating for the person...too much than he/she could take...
I dont completely agree to that...i mean...if that is what is to be done...how else will commitments be formed...Somewhere...when people meet...you always know what kind of relationship you want with that person...denying it...and avoiding it is just foolish and unfair i think...
And if it really makes things uncomfortable...the freindship/relationship was never meant to be...

I was thinking about all the people i know in and around me...and what they mean to be..and i was surprised about how I really feel for some people now...some relationships in life change...but in some cases...the core always remains...no matter what...and it happens naturally...

You need to laugh more. Life is filled with too many problems, to not laugh every day. ... We need to have a sense of humor going into this because it's too tough without it.
Coz sometimes...even though you know how its gonna end...doesnt mean you cant enjoy the ride...

I am loving the month so far...more things to write about...in the posts to come...

Monday, November 17, 2008

SIng Along...its the RIGHT air...

It happens...it always does...
Occasionally....you always are hit by this breeze of positive notes of music in the air...Its as if the Gods of Nature are singing to you...

Try this sometime...Hook on to your ipods/music players while walking on the road...and tune into your favorite song of the day...
"Tu sabbr toh kar mere yaar
zara saans to leh dildar
chal fikrr nu goli maar
yaar hain din jindadi de chaar...
haule haule ho jayega pyar chaleya
haule haule ho jayega pyar.."

It could be any song...a soothing tune...or a rocking filmy number...
Pump up to full volume...and just start concentrating on the lyrics...

You will immediately feel what exactly i am talking about...And it just changes your mood...
As if LIFE is calling you...showing you "the" reason to live...

Have ever wondered how sometimes the most shittiest of songs and lyrics sound amazingly well in situations...
How much ever i hate numbers which are a mere compilation of the regular gaalis and abuses...they are sometimes just what you need...

Entered Furtados office today...No idea why...and with no intentions what so ever....I never really understood why we did that...But i guess it was basically the love of Music and the idea of Marketing Music is something unique...


(Godd...that reminds me...I own a guitar...! Yipppiiiee!)







The point here isnt about bragging about my guitar though (yaa...i knw... THANK GOD!) its something different...






I am surprised by the comments and compliments i am getting from 3 people in the last one month... From people who have appreciated certain things about me and they are thankful that they did not miss knowing me.


But surprised is the word...I think it is very kind of them to say nice things...i dont know to what extent they mean it...but its nicee...to be valued sometimes...


What amazes me though...is that people say that i have opened up and taken efforts to go ahead and get to know people that i have stayed aloof for a while...
But come to think of it...Its really not me who has changed...because i know for sure that i havent taken any extra efforts to go out and talk to people...


It is THESE people who have actually come forward and known me...and i thank them for that...


"I do what i do...i am effortlessly genuine is whatever i do...be it HATE or CARE"

Thursday, November 13, 2008

"___________"


I have always wondered how it would be like to go completly BLANK...
Empty as though you were just born...

You have sanity...you know what goes around...whats happening...but you dont know anyone around...bad people....good people..

I feel that somewhere....you will always find the right people even then...people who care for you...and whom you should be with...and the story begins again...

I feel that if its taking away all the bad memories...its well worth it...!

Lost all my memories a few days back....went completely BLANK...like an empty vessel...
I know no one...everything i did or wanted to do...was now a empty space...

Somewhere...at first i was lost...
The very thought of not being able to relate to your past anymore was a scary one..
WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?
WHO AM I??
WHERE AM I HEADED??

But then...i thought...do i really need the past??
Sure...it was really good at times...worth cherishing...the sole existence of LIFE is afterall in "living" these moments...
But then...if its gone...it can be made again...maybe it wont be the exact same thing...but it will be good none the less...

It is said that LIFE always gives you two choices at every point in life...the one you choose opens a chapter that decides your future...
I have now chosen to stop worrying about the past that is gone...and LIVE and face the times ahead...

So...

To my 160 GB Hard Disk that crashed last week...and to the 100 GB of memories...photos...projects...movies...and all that defines my past that it took away...i convey my final GOOD BYE!
It was nice knowing you...I SMILE and move ahead...
:-)


On other things...
I was telling this to a friend of mine the other day...I might have talked about it even in my blog a lot of times...
Somewhere....you always know about the person when you first meet him/her...whether you can really trust that person enough...if the person is worth it...if he is selfish and just going to use you....that is exactly how you form friends with people you become close to....distant...

YOU ALWAYS KNW IT AT THAT VERY FIRST MOMENT...!
The problem occurs because you either ignore that bad feeling...postponing to some other time...saying that you have to give people a chance....
And thats wen you get yourself into trouble!

I dont see why you are the ones who should decide on giving people a chance...you are not GOD!!

If people are bad...they are not goin to improve for you...they WILL fuck you anyways....!
Ahhhh....if only people could get this point....!


Friday, November 07, 2008

Love,Actually


"Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion's starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it's always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaking suspision love actually is all around.

Waiting for Exams to get over...have a lot of things to update myself and this blog on...
Watching LOVE,ACTUALLY for tomorrows paper...LOL....i knw...Hard to digest that....but somewhere for Integrated Marketing Communication...i think this is all that will help!!!

Ahhhhh...I SIMPLY LOOOOVVVEE THIS MOVIE!!!
It can cheer me up any given day...any time...

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

What an IDEA...

I think the best thing a family teaches you is togetherness...
The festive season brings the "good" air around somehow...and the morning feels "just right" somehow...
You get this nice warm feeling inside...as if its a new life...a new beginning...
Like a fresh new plant...looking sky up...chasing its destiny....

Far away in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see the beauty, believe in them and try to follow where they lead...

I was thinking about why these festivals are celebrated...its a time for you to relax a bit....sit and look around...get back to old threads...friends and relatives...more than anything else...
Aaaahhh....and i am loving that feeling....

Noticed this thing the other day....


IDEA mobile launched itself in MUMBAI a few months back...and i spotted two of their campaign posters...both at extremes to each other...
First...i think the concept of you becoming a MUMBAIKAR just by buying an IDEA SIM itself  is hideously pathetic!!
Second...well...there is no need for a second...What were they thinking in the FIRST place!!!
LOL

The other campaign was about having a safe MUMBAI...they providing a HELPLINE number for Train suspected baggages and rescue work...
As if the present numbers dont provide service or they dont work!
HUH???
Seriously...WHAT WERE THEY THINKING???

Actually...after trying to really "think" what they were thinking (omg....so much thinking went into this post! LOLzz) I came to a conclusion that the first "MUMBAIKAR" campaign was to target all the outsiders who have settled in mumbai cashing in on the hue and cry created by Raj Thackerey and  the other POLICE HELPLINE campaign is cleverly targeted at the actual mumbai residents showing how much IDEA is concerned about their safety...
Goddd...Companies will do ANYTHING for business these days!!

What an IDEA???

Saturday, October 25, 2008

I wonder why he bloody does it...I dont want the freakin pain...
Somebody just shoot me in the head instead!!

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

impluse...b'day and what matters...

"Life seemed to be an educator's practical joke in which you spent the first half learning...
 and the second half learning that everything you learned in the first half was wrong!"
Done with the presentation finally...goddd...i soo bored of these things now!! 
It just seems the pace of life has slowed down somewhere...i feel the need to feel the rush of blood in my body....experience a sudden thrill...of adventure...love...surprise....something!

Sudden flashes of memories grip me...the good times...i am missing a lot of good times spent...i soo wish i could celebrate her b'day today...
Stupid job responsibilties...!!! why does she have to work always mann...give her a break people!! 
Anyways...like always...there will be a time well spent later...

I realise what was said today in the class was true...there is a definite lack of professionalism with people around....they are still in their college days...showing off innocence as if it was all that is to life...They need to live the right way...and soon...else the world is waiting to pounce upon...
I dont get it..its not that everything i say is perfect or that i know better...but still...there needs a change to be imbibed...even in me at some level...

Recession at its full swing btw...people in college are NOW realising something needs to be done...When i was shouting 3 months back...warning people abt the times ahead...that time all had gone deaf i think!
And if people still see that there is a ray of hope in this...and that things will improve all of a sudden...well...i dunno what to tell them...Please remain in your sweet dreamland...and i hope things work for you...
May be i am wrong...May be i am the one overreacting...but from what i read and understand..its better to be safe than sorry...

I dont think any of this matter though...who will ever talk about college when we are finally out...10-15 days maybe...one month max...after that...change awaits...a new life awaits....a new role...
So better make the most of it while it lasts....good or bad for that matter...
As one of my friend says...
"JUST FCKIN "BE" MANN! If people say you have attitude and that you are wrong in what in do or say...THEY ARE JUST JEALOUS! some day evryone will face consequences right...wats your problem then?"
LOLzz
Nice thoery i say....


Monday, October 20, 2008

I see life...and i die...


"Your life can change in an instant...that instant can last forever.."


I have to tell you...NO movie has gripped me sooo much till date...i simply loved it!
I stayed NUMB for 5 mins...
Its about a choice of life between two friends...only one lives....
I wonder how many people these days will give up their life to keep their best friend alive...

Death is a wierd concept...
They say that when you die...you whole life just flashes in front of your eyes...
I always thought it would be the past...what my life has been...and what has happened...some things i will regret....some...i cherished all the time i was alive...
But somewhere...what if your future also appears before u...what you would have been if you continued to live...
After all...everything i believe is a game of choices...its all written somewhere...you just select the different screenplays based on your choices...

Having fun these days...it good to know that there are people who care...and there are people whom you care for...and most importantly...who vlaue it...
I always wonder though....If things were not this way....WHAT WOULD BE DIFFERENT...

May be something else...something better...or worse...but then...WHY this and not something else??

"You know what....you will make a very good husband Prasad"
Hmm....not the first time i heard that statement...but i wonder why people keep sayin that...Coz i know that i am definitely NOT the best guy to be around with...
Its also freaky at times....coz then you start feeling ther is seriously somethin wrong with you!

Anyways...onto other things...

Ahhhh...i sooo feel like being in LOOOOOOVVEEEEE....
Right now though...Katrina is tooo busy to accept my proposal...
So i guess...that will just have to wait....
But  wonder....why does she hav to be sooo freakin cuuutee mannn!!!


i think i should start listening to Soniya...she always has a solution for everythin..the problem is that how much ever she tries...i never listen to her!!!
LOL
(Sorry gal...i knw u r rite...but hey...i just lovee to fall into trouble don i ??? )
Everytime i feel i should go by her way...arrgghhh...i always end up doin things differently...
This is a painting she had made...i simply love it...


Just got this from Sanjai...funny how small things can bring a smile on your face...
just came across a funny thing
it happened 2 yrs back
a frnd of mine went to social security application centre
usne uska birth year yede ne 2006 dala
2006
so the lady at the counter smiled n told him...u are a 6 month old cute baby
this guy just heard cute .....and said Thankyou in return
:-)

Friday, October 10, 2008

"Excellent...Superrrbb...Mail this to me...Ill see if i can publish it somewhere..."
"Excellent Analysis of Gazzprom"

Words i was waiting to here for long...

There is definitely something about this Professor...His words mean a lot to all of us in class...each and every comment he makes...
I dont know what it is about him...his teaching....or his personality...but it is definitely not just because we simply adore him...that he is given so much importance and respect...
There is something about this teacher...very few people in your life can leave such engraved impact on you...
One impact you cant forget...

You know....it is said...you should never let go of the people who leave a staunch impact on you...good or bad...better or worse...
Simply because...First...there are FEW such people...Second..if they are creating the effect that might alter your life....they definitely have some power...a power you have to recognize...
This power...must be stayed away from always in case of the bad...and valued always in case of the good done..but you should never let it go...simply because...then...when it hits you next time...you will not know what to do!

Talking about impacts...
Heard this thing about the good and the evil the other day...
It is said that a theory exists in LIFE....
The good people on this planet...are meant to do only good and they keep doing good...Similarly...the bad ones are meant to commit bad...and they keep doing it...
The idea lies in how effectively they do their job...

So...when at times you wonder why the people who are doing evil dont get hurt...just think...that they are doing their job...that is how it is...and that they will never be affected...simply because they r efficient at what they are MEANT to do!

LOL
That way....atleast you wont get affected...

"Aankhon mein jiske
Koi to khwaab hai
Khush hai wohi jo
Thoda betaab hai

Zindagi mein koi
Arzoo kijiye
Phir Dekhiye..."


Thursday, October 09, 2008

Tu hii toh merii dost he....

Its been long since i last posted...So a lot of things to be written....and i don know exactly where to start...

Was listening to the music of  Yuvvraaj...it feels like being in love...if the pure feeling that you get when you listen to the tune is what is like "being in love" that is...


I wonder sometimes....Why do i go mellow when i see Katrina Kaif these days...just a passing crush...or LOVE in the making...
aaaaahhh!!
:-)

Have you ever had that feeling sometime...of telling the person exactly how you feel...and then backing off coz it might just screw things up...or if not screw it...just...change certain things...
How you wish at these times that life was perfect...and things went your way...!!

I cant remember how many times i have thought of tellin a person..."Look...this is what you mean to me...!! "
But as they say....some things are better left unsaid...and some relationships...better left the way they are...Its good the way it is...why spoil it...

In life...you will always care for some people...maybe even love some people...you wish good for them...but the risk of letting go what you have is not worth telling them exactly how you feel...
So...as they say....JUST LET IT BE!!
Smile...and move on....

I have handled a lot of people and their situations till now...somewhere....now...i am at a stage where things are just too much to giv a thought to...
There are 3 people i know...close to me..and attached in some way or other...
Confused,hurt,helpless individuals...
They are caught in a mess they created...with surprisingly NO ONE being wrong in a way...!
Not that i am looking for a solution here...but somewhere what bothers me most is that there is no solution to it...
Arrggghh...Life...!

I sometimes feel the need to be held...to be told what is to be done next....somewhere coz i am tired of making decisions...
I guess everyone goes thru this phase...

Waiting for things to happen...missing a lota ppl....remembering the good times...and yes....most importantly...trying to maintain that SMILE on the face...


Wednesday, October 08, 2008

C H A N G E


The two sat on the sea bed....grazing at the water...the horizon seemed endless...

He looked at her...and said...
"Do you really need someone in your life who can change the way you are...I mean...you might be doing right...or wrong...but why do u need to change it...lead the way you lead life...if it fucks you...let it...wat difference does it really make?"

She: "Yaa...sure....you don need to change it...but it does change somehow always right...someone brings you to the right path....someone takes to more towards the evil..."

He: " Only if you allow it...dont let people influence you..."

She: "Its not abt "not" letting people influence...its abt identifying the people who mean good for you.."

He: "I dont think anyone can change the way i think or behave..."

She: " Someone just did...."

And she walked away....

He looked at her go...he turned and gazed at the sunset...with a smile on his face...

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

THE SELL OUT!

The news is big...the economy is down the drains...

Lehman Brothers have declared bankruptcy...The losses of Merill Lynch were so unbearable that its now sold to Bank Of America...and AIG is now soon to touch liquidation...

So now when these top companies are getting screwed...the big question is...what will happen toy YOU??
If they cant keep their money safe...what will happen to yours in the near future...

Was just talkin to a friend....abt the lehman sell out....look at his response

Saumit:
actually mera ek friend tha.. SIES MBA.. Lehman mein tha...
until last saturday at least...
~Prasad~:
:D
LOLzzzzz
Saumit:
we spoke at length about how there's a complete lack of activity @ wall street
and emerging markets kaise boom ho rahe hain
~Prasad~: okk...
Saumit:
too bad the fellow is jobless now :P

Ofcourse...before that...the bigger question for to-be-MBAs like me is....blodddy....where is the money goin to come from in the first place?????

The job market is going down like a rocket shot in the wrong direction...! To top this...people around havent even relaised what is goin to hit them in the days to come...how can they be sooo complacent abt things???
Strange....very strange....either too smart....or too unaware of whats happening around!

Sometimes people can be so caught up with themselves that they consider that whatever they do is justified and is right....just because of the stupid "this is how i am" attitude...
I just hope that by the time things hit them...its not too late!!

There are some moments in you life that make you feel that Life is really good...the freshness of goodness just blows you away sometimes....

Small things like you know for example....in the morning office rush hours...some people taking time out to put off all the lights and fans in the train...after the compartment has gone empty...makes you feel that there still is "concern" left in this world...somewhere the positivity is still there...

A smile in the corridor everyday...just makes your day...sometimes...such small things also do matter...when you take them away...there is no meaning left...

Have been giving this movie called "STAND BY ME (1986)" to all my friends...to an extent that im actually forcing them to watch it...!!
Its an amazing tale of two friends...a must watch for any person who values friendship....


================================================
Gordie: Fuck writing, I don't want to be a writer. It's stupid, it's a stupid waste of time. 
Chris: That's your dad talking. 
Gordie: Bullshit. 
Chris: Bull true. 
Chris: I know how your dad feels about you. He doesn't give a shit about you! Denny was the one he cared about and don't try to tell me different. Your just a kid, Gordie. 
Gordie: Oh, gee, thanks, Dad! 
Chris: Wish the hell I was your dad. You wouldn't be goin' around talkin' about takin' these stupid shop courses if I was. It's like God gave you something man, all those stories you can make up. And He said, "this is what we got for ya kid, try not to lose it." Kids lose everything unless there's someone there to look out for them. And if your parents are too fucked up to do it, then maybe I should! 


================================================
Teddy: This is my age! I'm in the prime of my youth and I'll only be young once. 
Chris: Yeah, but you're gonna be stupid for the rest of your life. 


=====================================================

The Writer: [voiceover] It happens sometimes. Friends come in and out of our lives like busboys in a restaurant. 
The Writer: [typing on computer] I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve. Jesus, does anyone?

=====================================================

The Writer: It was weird to me how, then, Teddy could care so much about his father, who practically tried to kill him, and I couldn't give a shit about my old man and he hadn't laid a hand on me since I was three! 

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Friendship

There are a certain people in your life...whose friendship for you doesnt change over time...
You feel the same warmth of their love every time you meet them...and i love that essence of true friendship!

Have had some really fun days in the past week...Living the life i want to live...grasping that every second i can stay away from what frustrates me and breathing...yess....BREATHING...!!

I realized that their are a very few people in your life...they just stick by you if they really want to...they value you and respect you...and that feeling which you feel when you know people want you to be with them is amazing...!

Somewhere....when you are there....experiencing the moment...you just let go...
Just relax...

I cant believe that I have actually become a part of a story about how you should NOT form a friendship...and people take an example of what should be avoided to sustain their friendships...!
LOL
Fcuk it!
Take a good look at your fake lives before that people!!

Btw...since i am talking abt friendship...ROCK ON is a must watch!!
Its actually the first movie i have watched TWICE in the multiplex...


I was telling a friend the other day, I actually like some people in college...i am desperate if you may call it....to meet them everyday...atleast say hi...and i genuinely feel that way about them...and its not because they are really close friends or anythin...its something else...
Cant really put a definition to it...
But its there...and its nice...

I look up the sky and wish...
"Let that feeling be..."

How much ever i hate going to college....atleast i have these people to look out for!


The Moment

The moment passes by,
It always does..
And yet,
You see it go.

Feel the moment?
Or, capture it? Or maybe both?
And yet,
You do none.

Shock, is that what it is?
You are suppose, dear,
To shock the world.
And yet.

Don't miss it, please,
If it comes back.
It will,
For YOU.

Friday, September 05, 2008

HAcked!

Found this writing today...Its like an anthem for hackers the world over...
But i am puttin it down for a completely different reason...

The Hacker Manifesto

by
+++The Mentor+++
Written January 8, 1986

Mine is a world that begins with school... I'm smarter than most of the other kids, this crap they teach us bores me...
Damn underachiever. They're all alike.

I'm in junior high or high school. I've listened to teachers explain for the fifteenth time how to reduce a fraction. I understand it. "No, Ms. Smith, I didn't show my work. I did it in my head..."

Damn kid. Probably copied it. They're all alike.

I made a discovery today. I found a computer. Wait a second, this is cool. It does what I want it to. If it makes a mistake, it's because I screwed it up. Not because it doesn't like me... Or feels threatened by me.. Or thinks I'm a smart ass.. Or doesn't like teaching and shouldn't be here...

Damn kid. All he does is play games. They're all alike.

And then it happened... a door opened to a world... rushing through the phone line like heroin through an addict's veins, an electronic pulse is sent out, a refuge from the day-to-day incompetencies is sought... a board is found. "This is it... this is where I belong..." I know everyone here... even if I've never met them, never talked to them, may never hear from them again... I know you all...
Damn kid. Tying up the phone line again. They're all alike...

You bet your ass we're all alike... we've been spoon-fed baby food at school when we hungered for steak... the bits of meat that you did let slip through were pre-chewed and tasteless. We've been dominated by sadists, or ignored by the apathetic. The few that had something to teach found us willing pupils, but those few are like drops of water in the desert.

This is our world now... the world of the electron and the switch, the beauty of the baud. We make use of a service already existing without paying for what could be dirt-cheap if it wasn't run by profiteering gluttons, and you call us criminals. We explore... and you call us criminals. We seek after knowledge... and you call us criminals. We exist without skin color, without nationality, without religious bias... and you call us criminals. You build atomic bombs, you wage wars, you murder, cheat, and lie to us and try to make us believe it's for our own good, yet we're the criminals.

Yes, I am a criminal. My crime is that of curiosity. My crime is that of judging people by what they say and think, not what they look like. My crime is that of outsmarting you, something that you will never forgive me for.

Sunday, August 31, 2008

...ramblings...

OUTSIDE COLLEGE: (7:30 am)

I am loving the morning breeze these days....world outside the "routine" is peaceful...it almost like falling in love with life...
I feel like going for a long walk...just...away...quiet serene calmness...
This is the time you need people close to you around you...
You think about what the days have been...and its been nice overall...

IN COLLEGE: (6:00 pm)

People around dont affect me anymore...I know i need to get out of the frustrating air around...my life is not worth wasting time here...in this room...choked up....desperate to break free...
Let people be....let them bloody suck at their stupid lives and feel good about what they are doing...

I know for sure...I am not a part of this...I have been true to myself and have done things with utter honesty...IT WILL PAY OFF...
If it doesnt...well...in Prof. Venkys words....BALLS!!!

A bit worried about placements these days...just wanna get it done and move out of college...have had enough of it...
Hoping my efforts pay off somewhere and i get in soon...
Once thats done....I knw my attitude will change...and ill be at peace somewhere...

I want to prove it to myself....that i am worth it..!!
And that people who have insulted me...are not right in what they did...because somewhere....they have hurt me soo much...that they have taken my confidence away...

I like Victors lecture...not that i completely agree to what he says....but its like a reflection of life thats happening around you...in your life...home...family...friends...
And somewhere you feel....there is more to this than just 2 years of "college life"

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

:-)

12:45 in the night....two friends walk the streets of Mumbai...somewhere at peace...somewhere its good...

You are not where you hated to be...away from the routine...the life u hate right now....and it feels nice for a change...

"I wonder how life wud be if we had grown in this part of the city....Our whole thinking process wud be different...Life would be different....the people around would be different...Nice it would be to start again somehow...in a completely different setting.."

"I think its the place we have been bought up...we are somewhere stuck in between..."

I agree...
but still...i feel...I wonder....Why this life...???

I look at the dark sky....and i SMILE...


"A new life....a new beginning...tell me life whats waiting for me...
A new life...a new beginning...tell me life whats my world, my destiny..."

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

IF

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings,
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone.
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

-From "The Family Album of Favorite Poems." Edited by P. Edward Ernest-

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Self conflict...Broken Glass

I somehow have lost all confidence to handle myself...Things at home are out of my control...people just keep screaming for no reason and i just try to ignore...keep quiet...but it does affect me i knw...somehwre because...there is no one to listen to my side of the story...

You sit down one day and decide that you are going to deliver good...and you stick to it no matter what...
Somehow...Now I am at a stage where i cant find the difference between right and wrong...Of what I am doing will hurt people...should i just move away...stay away...

I want people around....but will they be able to handle me...Coz i might just freak out someday...to avoid getting people too attached...

I really dont know what to do with myself...It just seems that whatever i did or the person i was till now...is all being challenged...

There is so much pretence around that it kills me from inside...i wish i could just wake people up and show them the reality...
But i knw...no one believes you...Whom do i share the truth with then...
Just keep it inside and keep getting frustrated...

The reason...coz the world doesnt see what you do...they just get carried away by the fake and pretence...

Fucking Self conflict!!
Someone just take me away...

Broken Glass

Look at all that broken glass
Dreams that never came to pass
A word unsaid,
A path untread,
And a host of uncompleted tasks.

Time is cruel, time's a cheat,
Time stays put, time does fleet:
A moment in the past
A lifetime can last,
And a lifetime is lost in momentary heat.

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust
Life goes on, it's life, it must.
But the realms of the mind
Hold memories unkind
Of unkept promises and broken trust.

When summer thus changes to wintertime
Come, my friend to a warmer clime
Cos there's someone who cares
Someone who shares
Your sorrows as well as your happy times.

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

selfish

i hate the words "Live and Let live..."

Esp when everyone around acts so selfish...when everything around you seems as though its give and take...

I feel that its a bad thing to be selfless in this world...it just doesnt pay somewhere...

People who do things for their own selfish reasons...always end up getting what they want...Everything turns out to be happy for them...

And emotional fools like me...end up being where i am...looking like a LOSER in between these millions of selfish souls...
Ruthless life is...no place for honesty...full of fakes...how can people not see the pretense?????

I think i need a break...or some change in my life pattern...seem to have lost my aura somewhere...

Went on my building terrace and shouted today at the top of my voice....felt really good....getting it all out...

Damn you God....lets meet in heaven...WE HAVE TO TALK!!!

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Talking thru the eyes....

Had a fun day today...seemed like the longest journey back home...
Was singing the most amazing songs in the most crappiest voice with college friends...and was just plain having fun...

Chaahe Jo Tumhe Poore Dil Se
Milta Hai Woh Mushkil Se
Aisa Jo Koi Kahin Hai
Bas Vahi Sabse Hasin Hai
Us Haath Ko Tum Thaam Lo
Woh Meherbaan Kal Ho Na Ho
Har Pal Yahan
Jee Bhar Jiyo Jo Hai Sama
Kal Ho Na Ho

Palko Ke Leke Saaye
Paas Koi Jo Aaye
Lakh Sambhalo Paagal Dil Ko
Dil Dhadke Hi Jaaye
Par Sochlo Is Pal Hai Jo
Woh Dastan Kal Ho Na Ho
Har Pal Yahan
Jee Bhar Jiyo Jo Hai Sama
Kal Ho Na Ho
Har Pal Yahan
Jee Bhar Jiyo Jo Hai Sama
Kal Ho Na Ho


Thankgod for them...atleast i can put a certain issues at the back of my head...



I never believed people could talk to through eyes...at least it never happened to me ever before...But then...sometimes that eye to eye look for a small moment says soo much...and then it just naturally follows a smile...
It feels amazing at times...as if u dont need to say anything...
May be there is nothing to communicate...but then...its still feels good...
I dunno how i missed it for sooo long....or rather..how did i notice it after soo long!

Jaya and Ekta wrote down a list of good qualities that i have...
LOL....funny it was...nice to knw that someone cares...
I will never ever forget the fact that Jaya was always the only person to ask me everyday "How are you?" "Did you have lunch?" "Everything ok..?" and this was when i needed it the most...

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

...missed OUTFLOW...

The past few days has taught me a lot...I have seen how people have moved away...and i have seen how impatient i am that i cant wait for things to be normal...i will push it till it goes worst...to a point of no return...

I dont have many regrets though....except for my reactions at times...but i definitely dint do or say things with a wrong heart...If there exist truth...that will show someday...

I wish i had someone right now to whom i could just say things...a lota things happening in life right now...and i need to settle down somewhere...be in peace...

Have been doing so much for people...i think i have lost my identity somewhere...and my existence...Had lost the thought that my needs also have to be fulfilled and that always waiting for things to come to you doesnt really work...
LIFE IS and ALWAYS WILL BE UNFAIR...

The frustration just rises at home...i dont feel like coming home...its the same old story abt how i am not involved and about how i am not responsible...I wish my parents cud find one responsible guy instead of me...i would be happy to move out...

But the sad part is...waiting in college doesnt help much either...This...my friend is called...BEING ROYALLY SCREWED!!!

No wonder...tears just roll out of no reason...i just cant take it anymore...
I HAVE NO EVIL IN MY HEART ATLEAST...AND I AM PROUD OF THAT...

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Some writings relate to life...

I had found this writing on Pheonix's blog long time back...She had posted it abt 2 months back...
Its amazingly written...its like a conversation between a girl and a guy abt their relationship..just thought i should keep it as a part of my blog memory...

Mind over matter

For some time now, I've been afraid to look into his eyes, to have a free conversation, to be able to confess what I love and hate about him, about myself, about this world. Really, afraid sometime, and grudgingly indulging in short lame conversations. And making the run, of course!

This ain't typically me, but it's the witless me. He's puzzled me so much by wide variations in his behavior I can't fathom what he really thinks anymore, and despite my curiosity to know, I'm scared, so scared, that if I went any closer to him at this point of time, at least one of us will fall in love with the other.
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I can never exactly pin-point what's going on in her twisted mind, but these days she's absolutely out of my radar. Or maybe, out of my life too, considering the way she acts most of the times as if she hates me, or is extremely bored/irritated of me. I should know better, for not long ago I thought I understood her well, and we were so close, so close that all I wanted was to somehow keep her mine forever...yes, I guess, that was it...that mad intensity with which I wanted to be with her, around her all the time. I don't know what it was, but it was both obsessive and addictive, and I really had to fight to gain some self-control and to not fall in love with her.

Love...was it that? Is it that? I doubt it...what is love anyway? I've always hated the notion of love but this time I don't know...but it seems quite the opposite with her behavior of late. She's running away, and and she's way too smart to do it explicitly, or to do it without a reason. Is it something in me? And yet, I want her back just as her. Pure, bright her.

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It's so easy to say "I don't care". It's so much harder to not care.

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It's so much easier to say "I hate her" than to actually not love her. You know, I think it was love after all, and all that while I didn't understand it. I can't even recollect clearly and chronologically what all happened to be able to understand when and where and why I lost her, but I know I have. To think of it, she never was mine anyway. It'd be best to forget her, but this love makes it impossible to do even that, just that it makes it awfully tough and painful to continue talking to her. Especially when she clearly does not care, or understand me any more. Why do people fall in love?!

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I so can't live without him. Or with him. Whenever I look at my past, the idea of love makes me flinch. It is so scary a thing to exist in the past, leave alone the future. And then, he hates the notion of love. He is an intense person, so much that if I showed him any tenderness his anger would completely annihilate me, as also his peace for a lot of time. And then, love's never done me any good. He is a great friend, why ruin it? Or at least, why ruin it this way?! It's wise to run, I think. Logical. Damn, why do people fall in love?

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"You're weird sometimes."
"As if you aren't. But you act as per your convenience and nothing else."
"Are you calling me selfish?"
"Aren't you?"
"...."
"Well, all you care about is your needs, and everything else is incidental."
"So are you my need that I care for you?"
"Do you, really?"
"No"
"See. That's just what you are, whimsical."
"You're weird, and self-obsessed."
"There could be other things I'm obsessed about...but anyway you wouldn't understand."
"Of course, I never understand anything do I?"
"Almost."
"Thanks"
"Thank you missy! For everything..."
"Whatever. Bye"
"Goodbye"
is the word, for I'm trying to hide somewhere from the questioning eyes of a friend so close, who wonders what went wrong. Or perhaps not. Perhaps he's guessed too. But it's such a stalemate this situation. And so I find myself making non-committal plans for meeting up


Dramatic effects often have distant, even subtle causes.


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